Will You Miss Me When I'm Gone?

Four or five years ago while perusing the new books at Borders, I picked up a non-fiction book titled "Will You Miss Me When I'm Gone?" A biography of the Carter Family written by Mark Zwonitzer and Charles Hirshberg, the book chronicles the lives and music of A.P. Carter, his wife Sara Dougherty Carter, and Maybelle Addington Carter, who was A.P.'s sister-in-law, Sara's first cousin and the mother of June Carter Cash.

I simply had to buy and read it. For one thing, the legendary trio were from Scott County, VA, which is also my home county. For another, A.P. and Sara's son, Joe, was one of my dad's best friends. At various times, Dad and Joe worked together, Joe as a construction supervisor and dad as the master carpenter that he was. Joe would stop by our house if he was in our end of the county, and we'd stop by and visit his family on the odd lazy Sunday afternoon.

Because of Joe, I met June Carter Cash and her hubby Johnny before I was old enough to realize they were country royalty. I touched and even bravely strummed one of Johnny's famous black guitars at Joe's house. And I simply had to take piano lessons--because if Joe's big ham-sized hands could make a piano "sing" surely mine could, too. (Joe, in the hat and striped shirt, is pictured here with Marty Stuart, Carlene Carter and John Carter Cash during a benefit for The Carter Family Fold.)

"Will You Miss Me When I'm Gone?" turned out to be a great read. And it made me really happy to have been born in the latter half of the 20th century when most of the major roads in my mountainous county had already been paved. Today, you can make the trip from Scott County to Bristol, TN, where the Carter Family made their first recordings in 1927, in less than an hour if you drive with a lead foot like me. It took the Carter's all day. They lived in another time and another world, and the biography does an excellent job of telling their story.

A.P. Carter died in 1960, Maybelle in 1978 and Sara in 1979 at the age of 81. Mom and Dad attended Sara's Scott County funeral in support of Joe. Mom says I didn't go because I was in school. I don't really remember that, but most 17 year-olds live in their own heads and prefer not to think about death. It's possible I didn't even want to go.

After I read the book, I kept meaning to take it "home" to Scott County on one of my weekend visits and get Joe to autograph it. (He would have gotten such a big kick out of that request.) But I didn't. Dad was sick by then and I was focused on spending time with him. Joe visited Dad now and then, but not when I was home. I kept telling my husband that we'd go to The Carter Family Fold one Saturday night, and I'd introduce him to Joe and maybe his sister, Janette, but it didn't happen. And then Joe was gone. I learned about it from my mom during a typical phone call.

Upon Joe's death, Janette became the last living child of A.P. and Sara. With help from her children, Dale Jett and Rita Jett Forrester, she continued to run The Carter Family Fold and the Carter Family Museum until her death in 2006...on my birthday. (That date has stuck with me like one of those weird trivia answers that you never forget.) Today, Rita is the driving force of the Carter Family Fold--with a little annual fundraising help from family and friends like those pictured above.

If you love country music or history, I urge you to pick up a copy of "Will You Miss Me When I'm Gone." And if you're really into Appalachian or bluegrass music, you'll also have to plan a trip to The Carter Fold while it's still going strong. I'm talking live acoustic-only bluegrass with flatfooting and clogging and two-stepping every Saturday night. For a sample of the action, check out the streaming videos here.

Better still, spread your tourism dollars around the area by following The Crooked Road, Virginia's heritage music trail.

Just two counties north of The Carter Family Fold is another bright stop on The Crooked Road, the Ralph Stanley Museum and Traditional Mountain Music Center. If you know anything about bluegrass, you'll know who Ralph Stanley is. Doesn't ring a bell? You're wrong. Think "Man of Constant Sorrow" and "O, Death" from the movie "O Brother, Where Art Thou?" and you'll hear that haunting voice in your head.

And that brings me to the end of this blog. I'll leave you with the haunting lyrics of "Will the Circle Be Unbroken?":

Will The Circle Be Unbroken?
By A.P. Carter

I was standing by my window
On a cold and cloudy day,
When I saw the hearse come rollin'
For to take my love away.

Chorus
Will the circle be unbroken?
By and by Lord, by and by,
There's a better home a-waitin'
In the sky Lord, in the sky.

I told the undertaker,
"Undertaker, please drive slow,
For this body you are haulin' Lord,
I hate to see him go."

Well, I followed close behind him,
Tried to hold up and be brave,
But I could not hide my sorrow
When they laid him in the grave.